A social media user has been writing reviews of animals and rating them out of five stars for absurd reasons that will make your day.
The 'Welcome to my meme page' page (yes, that's what it's called, we didn't repeat ourselves) has some of the most accurate, informative descriptions of animals, revealing to the world that birds gained the power of flight because of their devotion to the Devil. Scroll down to see everything you've ever thought about animals that you were always afraid to admit.
1. Maybe if bears could appreciate an innocent gesture, they wouldn't be such terrible party guests
2. You'll think twice before calling a parasitic roundworm over for Netflix and chill
3. Consider me ashamed, but ants are definitely going places
4. Snakes certainly do make for untrustworthy tubes
5. You won't be able to say "We don't deserve this!" when the locusts bring divine retribution
6. This reminds me of that one time I asked a badger for directions, and he directed me off a cliff
7. Perhaps the worst thing anyone has ever seen a dog do is alchemy
8. There's a reason why moth rhymes with Goth
9. Beetles are the most well-adjusted, emotionally stable creatures I know
10. They're good bois, too - they just don't have enough leg room to roll over and play dead
11. Tables are the plus ones everyone wants to take to a wedding
12. Crocodiles deserve a reward for keeping our oceans saliva-free
13. The story of crabs grabbing hold of 'beautiful' people may have more sinister origins...
14. Perhaps we should be more worried about crabs in the bush than about birds in the bush
15. We all have that one friend who got out of the shower to the sight of a jellyfish peeping in through the window
16. The few successful cults out there were all started by spiders