The statements that we use in the heat of the moment or some common phrases can be dangerous making the relationship tense and sometimes it might simply lead to a breakup.
In a relationship, there are instances where you must have said something to calm the situation down, but it blew out of proportion. While you might not have done that intentionally, one must be careful using certain phrases in a relationship as it can cause unavoidable situations and sometimes huge fight, as well. You need to be particular of the words you choose in a relationship.
In addition, there are times when you would say things that you did not intend to in the heat of the moment, but there are things we say not realizing how negative they are. Using phrases like “you always…or you never” can genuinely be an exclamatory statement, but can come off as criticism or complaining. So, these are a few common phrases that can destroy a relationship and they should be eliminated from your vocabulary.
This phrase used in a certain context could set a perception that you wait for your partner to make mistakes and use this opportunity to stick it to them. For instance, if your partner forgets to make an anniversary reservation because he/she was busy at work saying “I knew it” is going to worsen the situation.
It would make your partner feel that you see them as a constant failure and they are incapable of getting things done. This could also lead to suppressed emotions, which could hamper the relationship because of your inconsideration of their situation. Use subtle statements like “I understand, but I am a little disappointed.”
Your partner does not want to be told this statement, EVER! If you want to make a point to your partner and don't want to use the aforementioned phrase.
Take alternate ways to make your point and politely advise your partner to change the way they talk to you. This can lead to resentment to build up in the relationship and eventually your partner will walk out on you.
There might be moments when your partner is furious about certain things or situations and telling them to not be too sensitive about it isn't going to help you out. Rather it can make things messier. This would feed their anger rather than comfort them and because of obvious reasons they are failing to see the other side of things.
Calming down your partner by attacking their emotions and instructing them how to feel is not a great way to go about things. This would make them feel like their feelings are not understood and reflect on your lack of emotional empathy.
Making broad generalizations about your partner's flaws or bad decisions? There are difficulties in everybody’s life and in a situation where you do not get something from your partner, saying that “you always do that” is going to make them feel guilty and hamper them emotionally.
This is a method to get the job done according to your wishes, which is turning this relationship into a toxic one-sided relationship. Your partner would also feel underappreciated since you tend to ignore the other times he/she has made you feel special. Being polite and discussing the problems in the situation can help draw a clearer picture making it a healthy relationship.
Second guessing your partner's opinion and making it sound ludicrous can demoralize them, which is the mark of an unhealthy relationship. When you are disgusted, do not attack the integrity and self-respect of your partner, but talking things out and coming to a mutual conclusion, is what will make your relationship last longer.
In addition to this statement, avoid drawing links between behavioral patterns saying that “you are just like your mother,” which is a definite deal-breaker in a relationship. Well, however angry or emotionally heightened the situation gets making personal attack will not help the situation.
This is a definite and obvious phrase you should not use in a relationship under any circumstance. If love did not exist in the equation then your partner would not have been with you and stake your love to get things done according to your wishes is a deal-breaker.
This is a situation of emotional manipulation, which is not acceptable in any healthy relationship. Questioning your partner's love for you based on the choice of their actions is out of bounds in a relationship that shows multiple compatibility issues in the relationship.
This is the worst state to use in an argument because it is a straight-up threat putting the entire relationship at stake. In the heat of the moment it might sound like a good comeback and did not mean it literally, but it can result in a permanent split. This shows the lack of concern and unsupportive nature in the relationship, which eventually leads it to where it was headed, but faster.
These are a few phrases that can bring tension in the relationship or lead to a direct split, but while saying them the underlying message would be ignored. Being careful of the things you say in a relationship would help maintain the solidarity of the relationship and retain a future. Communicating clearly what you are trying to say can help avoid these hurdles in a relationship and yet make yourself heard.