It is normal to say things that you did not mean in the heat of the moment, but there are certain warning signs about your partner's anger that you should not ignore.
Being angry is a normal emotion and it is unrealistic to think that you or your partner would be happy all the time. Also, there are healthy ways to express your rage and not unnecessarily elevate the situation. It is normal to say things that you did not mean in the heat of the moment, but there are certain warning signs about your partner's anger that you should not ignore.
You need to recognize these emotions and identify the signs of a rage disorder. This would help you protect yourself and stay safe in the relationship. Arguments and conflicts that lead to emotionally heightened moments are normal in a relationship, which makes it imperative to handle it in a healthy way. The important factor to be considered is the approach you make to resolve the anger management issues.
Being accusatory and assertive about the issue would aggravate the rage, instead, you need to state your intentions or rather motives affects the outcome of the discussion. If your attempts yield no fruit then, consulting a therapist would help get constructive feedback and avoid the repercussions.
If your partner is angry in a healthy manner then they would be able to contain their emotions and keep them in check. This would also help them understand the other side of the situation and react in an appropriate manner.
But, if your partner spirals out of control, this would reduce their ability to deal with the situation in a rational manner. Uncontrollable anger is something that helps draw a distinction between healthy and unhealthy rage.
If your partner spirals out of control and lashes out, after which, he/she feels guilty about bursting out in that situation, is an indicator of mismanaged rage. This guilt seeps in because of the things they must have said or done in the heightened situation. The uncontrolled actions would make them regret their actions, thus, leading to guilt. Well, feeling guilty or ashamed after an outburst of rage might be an indicator of Intermittent Explosive Disorder.
The actions that follow healthy anger would be contained and the would not impact you in a physical or mental state. But, if your partner has anger issues then, the outburst would lead to harmful actions. This represents the lack of channeling their anger towards actions to things that would be beneficial in calming them down.
Instead, they would participate in actions such as drinking, breaking things and it might also lead to domestic violence. Irrespective of the unhealthy actions they choose, but it is a sign that their anger is more serious than you imagined.
Intermittent Explosive Disorder can be spotted if your partner is low-key frustrated all the time. This is evident if your partner gets frustrated for the smallest of things or even if the situation does not call for it. Well, this is a clear indication that it is not healthy anger.
Constantly being irritated or frustrated is also because of unresolved anger, which is seeking ways to escape. Resolving the issues in your mind would help you channel your emotions in the right way without causing unintended consequences.
Some people in angry situations do not make it visible that they are displeased or enraged by the situation. This is controlled anger and managed in a healthy manner, which would make your partner feel heard. On the other hand, if your partner makes it visible that he/she is angry, it can be a sign of rage disorder.
The change in expression could be visible by, the clenching fists, teeth biting, or their eyes going blank that are signs of uncontrolled rage. If you are comfortable talking to your partner about it then, take the necessary precautions. Avoid accusing or blaming them, which would spark rage rather than cooling them down.
Being in control of your temper and mind would help you make calculated decisions, which would lead to complete retention of thoughts. But, if your partner blacks out and does not remember their actions of words in the state of anger then it is a sign of mismanaged rage. If this is impacting your relationship in a negative manner. And the two of you are not able to mutually resolve the issue, then consulting a professional would help tame the rage.
In some instances, rage could lead to violence, which is never acceptable in any relationship. You need to take measures to protect yourself and reconsider the relationship because it is unacceptable to be assaulted because of your partner's rage.
If you wish to fix the situation and sustain the relationship then, enrolling in an anger management course and consulting a professional would help contain the situation. This would help you determine the appropriate course of action that you need to take to keep yourself safe.
If you notice that your partner’s rage is taking an unhealthy turn then it might be a sign of a rage disorder. Identifying the type of anger would help you take action to safeguard yourself and help your partner. In many situations, it would result in you fearing your partner then, talking about it amongst yourselves or with a professional would help. This would help you find ways to sustain your relationship and maintain a healthy equation between the two of you.
Also, seeking professional assistance can help figure out the best way forward, either with or without your partner.