Dad’s attempt at disciplining toddler sparks intense debate — is it strict parenting or 'abuse'?
What counts as discipline, and where does it cross into abuse? For generations, parents have debated this question, but nowhere is the divide more evident than in the online reactions of Millennials and Gen Zs. The viral TikTok video in question brought this cultural clash into sharp focus, as people of different ages flocked to the comment section to share sharply contrasting perspectives.
The video itself, a mother trying to coax her son to hold her hand, a frustrated father intervening with a gentle smack, and the child's emotional response, or the tantrum wherein he didn't listen to his mother but kept running away from her, became more than just a family moment, instead it turned into a flashpoint that laid bare shifting definitions of appropriate parenting across generations.
In a viral TikTok video uploaded by @ericadee808, a mother is seen trying to get her young son to hold her hand as they walk to a car where the father is waiting. The mother asks politely and calmly multiple times, but the boy keeps running ahead without turning back. When he reaches the car, the father, visibly frustrated, gently smacks him and scolds him for not holding his mother’s hand. The child then pretends to cry, clearly upset. After being told again to hold her hand, he finally complies, and when the mother asks him to blow a kiss to daddy, he obediently does so.
The video sparked a heated debate online, with viewers sharply divided over whether the father's actions constituted responsible discipline or crossed the line into abuse. Some, like @Alanna Kendal and @Miles_Teg7, defended the father's response. They argued that the gentle smacking was a form of discipline, reinforcing lessons about safety and respect, not abuse. “This is called discipline, not abuse,” one commenter, @whatitdoabbbbackup, insisted, emphasizing the difference between firm parenting and harmful punishment.
Others, however, strongly disagreed. Commenters like @kaywwi0 found the video difficult to watch, pointing out that the child was simply excited to see his dad and that the physical punishment seemed an overreaction. They criticized the approach as fear-based obedience that pressures the child into compliance rather than teaching with patience and respect. “Kids deserve to be guided with respect, not forced into compliance through pain and guilt,” they wrote, highlighting concerns about emotional manipulation following the punishment. Still, some viewers like @Prplehze7 took to offer practical advice on how to prevent such conflicts, saying, “Momma asking the wrong question because holding his hand in this situation is non-negotiable. Should’ve been give me your hand or just taking his hand.” to set expectations firmly but kindly.
However, Discipline is intended to teach and guide children through respectful, non-physical methods like setting clear expectations and explaining consequences, helping them learn boundaries and build trust. In contrast, physical abuse uses force to control or punish, often causing pain, fear, or trauma, and damaging the child’s emotional and psychological well-being. Research consistently shows that even light physical punishment is linked to negative outcomes such as increased aggression, anxiety, and problems with mental health, leading experts and organizations like the World Health Organization to recommend positive, non-violent discipline strategies.
For more videos like this, you can follow @ericadee808 on TikTok.