Dad's hot take on prioritizing marriage over children sparks debate: 'I respectfully disagree...'

Parenting declares itself as self-important. Children climb the priority list while parents, who were once lovers, dive headfirst into caring and nurturing duties. It becomes a struggle to maintain their personal relationships while at the beck and call of their kids. But this dad here, Steve Hendrix, who goes by @stevie_hendrix on Instagram, is taking the internet by storm with his unpopular opinion on prioritizing his wife over their children. The father made an appearance on The Long Game podcast (@tlgpodcast), where he spoke about informing his kids that their marriage comes first. While many people agreed with his viewpoint, others were conflicted and shared their thoughts. 

The clip begins with Hendrix hinting at his parenting approach. “I came home, I would tell my kids, ‘I’m spending time with your mom, and she’s first. And you guys can play for a little bit, but I’m gonna sit on the couch, and I’m gonna hang out with your mom,’” the father said. As most would assume, this statement might prompt the children to feel vulnerable and detached from their parents. However, that's barely true. The dad noted that, on doing so, his kids feel more “secure” and do not feel neglected. 

“When you actually put each other first, not just saying it, but when you actually physically do it, your kids respond in such a way that they actually feel a lot more secure,” Hendrix continued. “By loving your spouse, you are actually, by extension, loving your kids.” The snippet sparked a debate among viewers, collecting 381,460 hearts and a mix of opinions. A viewer (@art_by_nico) said, “My parents were like this with each other; never made me feel hurt. Just taught me the importance of prioritizing my partner. I always felt 100% loved and prioritized as a child.” “My husband will always be first. As much as I love our child, he's my everything,” wrote another (@kristina_manno86). Someone else (@zachary_harding) chimed in, “This is the biggest game changer in my relationship.” 

There was a fair share of critics raising questions about Hendrix’s parenting. “‘Mom is first’ to a child translates to 'You are less important / You are last,'’ opined @unabortable.fetus while @kamalani____ said, “I respectfully disagree with this approach.” “No….nobody is more excited to see you when you come home than your little ones. As a mom, please spend 10-15 minutes with them first! Just period,” asserted @reignhenceforth. “Why did he think he did something with this approach?” quipped another critic (@heyazka). 

According to Donna Novak, Psy. D., of Simi Psychological Group, it is important that parents share a deep and connected relationship to raise a family with love and support. Moreover, a conscious focus on marriage adds to personal growth and will go a long way. Eventually, kids will leave for college and make families of their own. Then, at the end, the parents are left with each other again. A poor relationship will not add value to their lives and will result in an unhappy life.

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